Hotel from Hell
by Tono Radish
Summary: I just wanted to get into my hotel room… they didn't have to call the police...


**Let me tell you now that everything is based on real events… like this happened to me… WTF**

My name is Ai Nitori and I'm a third year in high school and captain of my school's swim team. It's summer break and I'm out of town with my vice captain, in name only, Momotaro Mikoshiba. Why I decided to go anywhere with him I'll never know. He's spent the whole week on his phone, or listening to music and tuning me out, or jerking off in the bathroom to pictures of otters. Haha, just kidding. I had to get my revenge on him somehow? I mean he managed to make me a third wheel when it's just the two of us here!?

Anyway today I decided to go to the aquarium and look at the sharks. Everyone says my spirit animal is a duck but I don't know, I've always had a fondness for sharks. I took a ton of pictures and I looked really cute making peace signs and stuff with the different breeds. A girl even tried to pick me up can you believe it? Sadly, well, I'm not exactly into girls. Haha, you got me to say it. I'm kind of insecure about that so it's a personal secret. I mean I'm captain of a swim team so I'm with half naked guys all the time. What would they do if they knew I was a total homo? I only have to keep it a secret until the end of this year and then I'll be free! Get it? It was like a pun of some sorts. Okay okay. Now to the point of this story.

It was already hot that day so I was a little sweaty and agitated from all the walking I had to do from the aquarium to the hotel. I sighed, when I got back maybe I could watch a movie on TV or something? That's when I got to the room and realized I didn't have my key. Hmmm, did I leave it inside? Oh well, I'll just have Momotaro let me in. I knocked on the door a few times but nothing happened. Then I called out to him. Still nothing? I kept knocking until I decided to hit the door with my palm a few times. What? Does he have his headphones in or something stupid again?

"Hey! Momo! Let me in!... HEY!"

It was at this point I started kicking the door, trying to get his attention or maybe even kick the door down myself. I started screaming his name and banging on the door as loud as I could. Out of context that sounds super dirty. It was then I noticed some people were peeking out of their doors to look at me and laugh. Another door opened to reveal a frightened older woman. I blushed like crazy apologizing to all of them and continued to try and quietly knock. Oh but if I keep it this quiet there's no way he'll hear me! Damn it! Why did he have to listen to his music so loudly!? I got frustrated and started beating down the door again and yelling.

"MOMOTARO! MOMOTARO! HEY! LET ME IN ALREADY!"

"Is there a problem?"

I looked over and saw… the police. Oh shit. An older man was eyeing me. I laughed nervously.

"Hahahahaha! Ah, no. Well, yes. I went out and forgot my room key and I was hoping my friend would let me in but I think his head phones are on a little too high a volume."

He didn't seem to buy it. Wait, buy what? It's the truth!

"Are you're not angry?"

"Angry? What?"

"This isn't anything violent, you aren't planning to hurt the person on the other side of this door?"

"Hurt? WHAT NO!? IT REALLY IS JUST I CAN'T GET IN!?"

"Do you have any proof that this is in fact your room?"

"What? Well… I don't know? I don't have a key?"

"What's your name?"

"Ai Nitori?"

He eyed me some more then pulled out his radio and started talking, "Yes, I have an adolescent here who claims they can't get into their room."

Adolescent? I just gave you my name! And why are you using the word "claims?" This really is my room! Oh god he's calling for back up!? Should I run? Why am I thinking of running!? I'm not a felon!? I just wanted to look at some sharks… Woe is me. Suddenly another cop appeared, he looked to be around thirty with spiky blonde hair and a red face. He gave me one look and decided that I was a criminal. What!? I'm a little white boy on vacation! I'm a harmless tourist I swear!

"And if I open the room," the new cop said, "there will be someone on the other side?"

I nodded. What the hell is going on? So he opened the door with a master key card and I looked inside. No, I was going to look but the older cop held me back while the blonde one went inside holding his gun. No seriously, what the hell is happening!? They finally let me look inside when… whos' stuff is that? There were children's clothes thrown all over the place and bags I didn't recognize? But… this was my room right? I looked at the number by the door again… 1039… 1039… WAIT!? MY ROOM IS 1339!?

I turned back to the cops nervously and red, "haha, woah wait this isn't my room. I'm sorry guys my room is actually 1339?"

They looked unimpressed and whispered between themselves for a minute.

"We'll need you to come with us."

Woah what!? They dragged me off next and I was suddenly in a dark office when a young man with black hair and blue green eyes sat down. He was young, maybe in his twenties and handsome too. But his eyes looked evil.

"Take a seat, Mr. Nitori."

I was already in a chair? He took a seat across from me.

"I'm officer Sosuke Yamazaki. Do you have any proof that Ai Nitori is your real name?"

OH MY GOD THEY THINK I'M A TERRORIST!?

"I umm well here, I have my driver's permit?"

He took a look at it and then called in another officer, "we're going to have this checked. I'll be right back. Don't move."

I'm going to jail. I'm going to jail because I'm an idiot. My first romance will be when I accidentally drop the soap. I'll never get married. I'll never find a job. Nope, idiots like me go to Shawshank. I started to cry a little. I don't want to be a jail bird. I want to live. I sat there for another fifteen minutes when the door opened again. Another cop appeared, he was young and handsome! Woah! You can arrest me now! Woot woot! Sound the sirens!

He took a look at my face and started… laughing? Then he took out a handkerchief with a red shark sewn into the corner. We're soul mates. He gave it to me to wipe my face while he finished up his laugh fest.

"So," he grinned, flashing his shark teeth, "What happened?"

I looked at my feet blushing, he's making fun of me, "… wrong floor."

And then he started laughing again. He actually bent over from laughing so hard! He laugh was actually really cute… in a cocky police officer way. He handed me my driver's permit and smiled.

"I'll escort you to your room Ai Nitori."

I smiled, almost crying again, "really!?"

He grinned, "As long as you're not a terrorist! Hahahahaha!"

He helped me out of the office and back to the elevator. I'd have to remember to thank Momo for being such a dumb ass. If he wasn't then I wouldn't have met my future husband. I definetly wanna marry him now if only to tell people how we met. Oh that would be funny. And then we got to my room and I was about to knock again when he stopped me, pulling out his master key card.

"Don't worry about it, besides, I'd rather not have the whole firing squad show up again."

He opened the door and I looked inside. Yup, this is my room. Yup, there's Momo listening to extremely loud music. He didn't notice us at all so I turned back to the cop.

"So… thanks for saving me and stuff umm what's your name?"

He smiled saluting me, "Officer Rin Matsuoka! At your service! And it was no trouble at all. I should be thanking you for giving me something to do today haha!"

I know he was making fun of me, but I couldn't help but smile and laugh with him. Then his radio went off again. He smiled and waved at me goodbye as he walked off.

"Try to stay out of trouble Ai Nitori~"

And then he was gone, around the corner of the hall. I entered the room and swiftly kicked Momo. He started yelling at me but I didn't care. I sat down on the other bed and spaced out. That cop… Rin Matsuoka… was really handsome… I think I'm in love!

**I actually had this happen to me today. Except for the falling in love with the attractive younger cop, though there was one that helped me out that was like twenty something and kinda handsome. But yeah… truth is stranger than fiction… most definitely.**


End file.
